Why do bipolar people push partners away? Bipolar is a depressive mood disorder characterized by deep depressive episodes in conjunction with manic phases. The disorder is not curable, but it can be successfully managed with the right medication. However, until the patient has been diagnosed, the illness can wreak devastation in the patient’s personal relationships.
Why do bipolar people push partners away?
Not all people who are manic-depressives will behave in the exact same way, but there are common patterns to the symptoms of the illness, and withdrawing from friends and family and all social situations is a classic symptom of the depression that marks a depressive phase of bipolar.
Along with manic phases, depressive episodes are one of the features of bipolar disorder, and one of the features of depression is that the sufferer will shun contact with friends and family and close down emotionally, which can make it very difficult for partners to deal with.
There are lots of reasons why bipolar people push partners away. Often it is done out of guilt and as a way of protecting those they love: the depressed person knows they are hurting those around them, so they figure that it will be easier for those they love if they—the bipolar person—is not there. Sadly guilt plays a big part in relationships where one partner is suffering from a depressive illness: even when the person is well, they still feel guilt for the times they caused hurt to their partner, and for the bad times they know could be just around the corner.
Another reason for pushing their partner and family away is because the bipolar person feels that nobody truly understands what they are feeling and the depressed person cannot bear to be around those who they see as being “happy”.
Bipolar is sometimes the result of a dysfunctional and abusive childhood, and in some cases the resultant depression comes from a deep-rooted belief that the person does not deserve to be loved. As a result of this, the person sub-consciously behaves in such a way as to sabotage the relation by shutting down emotionally and withdrawing completely.
How can partners learn to cope with a bipolar person?
Bipolar is a very difficult condition to live. During the manic and depressive phases, the patient is often unaware of how badly they are behaving and it is only when they are back to their normal selves that they are able to appreciate how awful they were, which only serves to further compound the guilt they feel.
However, it is very important to realize that bipolar is an illness and the affected person is not deliberately trying to hurt their partner out of malice. Try and keep the lines of communication open and if the person has not yet accepted that they are ill, do your best to encourage them to see a doctor: once the correct medication has been prescribed, the symptoms of bipolar can usually be controlled very easily.
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